January came and went. First I was in South America in the Colombian jungle, next South Beach, Miami which is its own jungle. Then I came home and moved with a jungle of boxes. I think I am finally out of the jungle, but it’s hard to say. I moved into the heart of the Portland art and funky zone, an area named Nob Hill…or Snob Hill from the look of the prices on the menus of the local bistros. I will either have to win the lottery, sell more art and writing or find a very aged boyfriend who would love to take me to dinner and by dessert will forget who I am. Speaking of love…

February is just teaming with those Valentine vibes. The stores have been making shelf space for hard candy hearts with messages, boxes of chocolates and of course I’m-so-cute-I-could-puke stuffed animals. Yes, I’m jaded. Yes, I’m a cynic. But on the bright side, I don’t have to share any of the chocolates I just bought myself.

The problem I have with St. Valentine’s Day is the same issue I have with Christmas and Easter, the celebrations have been ‘Hallmark-isized’ to death. The original intent of honoring this Saint was to note how selfless he was. There are many legends surrounding Valentine. One says that he married couples in love when the British forbade it, another that he wrote letters to the downtrodden of encouragement on heart shaped ivy leaves from his prison cell. These notes were then spirited away by doves. Whoever he was he was NOT a pudgy cupid. He was NOT hocking diamonds. And he was NOT a supporter of romantic love.

Romantic love hangs out while the getting’s good. And when the getting is not so good, “Bye-bye love, bye-bye sweet caress, hello loneliness, I think that I could die, bye-bye my love good-by” (Everly Brothers…if you have to ask).

Real Valentine’s love, now that is a new subject and one that does not sell cards, candy or crap. Real love takes action. Real love is kind when others are rude and hurtful. Real love looks beyond today and seeks peaceful solutions for a long way down the road. Love is NOT a business manager flipping tricks so each quarter looks good to the stock holders.

Real love is a new economy based on some very old principles. What if getting ahead meant you were selling your soul? What if insisting life owed you a higher standard of living meant you would never be happy? The truth is stuff, status and standing doesn’t tell me much about your character, other than you have sold out. You will never find lasting peace by looking for love in all the wrong places (Waylon Jennings).

Love is helping up someone who cannot return the favor. Love is giving to someone who doesn’t deserve it. It is all about investing in people and being willing to lose that bet more than win it. Love is an action, not a reaction. It is intensely passionate, but seeks no gain.

February can be a month of joy and miracles if you will let go of what’s in it for you and give away your heart, money and soul to someone who is lonely, abandoned and forsaken. And just for fun do the giving anonymously. Give to someone who cannot possibly return the favor. Just add a note to “Pay it forward” (Catherine Ryan Hyde).